Erika Sanely (erika_sanely) wrote,
Erika Sanely

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Writing from an internet kiosk at the airport

First up, thanks to all of you who sent hugs. I cannot even being to tell you howq that made me feel. You guys are a tower of strength I'm drawing from right now.

Without giving anything away, let me say this time in my life was not the right time to see the movie "The Notebook." Damn elderly! :shakes fist at the reviewers who called this a love story.: Love stories are supposed to be pure fluff that make you happy with the world.

Also, department stores really need a section for funeral clothes. It was so hard to find something suitable - all the black clothes were in the genre of "Disco-Tarty", all the rest had these fou-fou frilly bits Nan would hate.

If I could ask one favour from all of you - if you believe in anything divine, no matter what god, could you pray to them that Nan dies. It kills me to write that, but if there was ever a time to let go, this would be it. She just won't stop breathing; she's had no food or fluids since Friday and as of late Friday evening ther's no activity from the neck up. But her heart still beats. I always said she was a strong old thing, and she has to prove it the hardest way possible.

In a surreal moment, I discovered I may be called on to help dig the grave. Nan wants to be buried in an incredibly old cemetary next to her husband and son. She had originally planned to be put on top of Leo (her husband) but changed her mind and now wants to be beside him. The problem is they might not be able to get a bob-cat in to dig a place for her. To which my father says "If she wants to be buried there, she will be. Even if we have to dig it ourselves."

In a lighthearted moment Nan is so well-organised she has the route she wants to take to the cemetary all planned. She doesn't want the usual road taken, as it is very bumpy. She has always hated bumpy trips. I love this stubborn side - even dead she wants a smooth ride.

Hopefully the next time I write she will have her peace. I can't believe - being the strong Catholic she is - she didn't listen to the Nun! If a Nun told me I was going to die, I'd listen to her.

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