It's true. Terribly sad, but true. Road-rage, shopping-rage, game-show-rage - all these afflictions of modern society I have bypassed. (Although, thinking upon on it, I may suffer a bit from game-show-rage. Since I can't stand the man who hosts Australia's "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?" I don't watch it that often. And the things I yell at the tv screen might be less about the stupid contestants and more about Eddie MacGuire.)
When it comes to games, I am generally a placid gal. I aim low in most things, and in ball sports especially. If I can get out of a game involving a ball with only a mild concussion, I consider the game a success. Who wins and who loses are secondary. If I could, I would play ball sports that require even the tiniest amount of hand-eye coordination against 4 year olds. And even then, the game would most likely be neck and neck. Okay, even then my arse would be grass. End result: Erika 0 - 4 year old 150.
Trivial Pursuit I handle well, as long as I don't win. Most people are bad losers; I am a bad winner. I am a gloater. I do victory dances that normally only get seen at grand final footy matches. But it all ends well, and everyone leaves in one piece.
Not so when it comes to Uno.I become a woman possessed when playing Uno. So much so, my friends have banned me from playing this game forever and ever. And ever. Plus a month.
It's not my fault, honestly. I just believe that if you're going to play it, people need to play by the rules. You can't go making things up half-way through a game. If you have a green card, and a green card needs to be played next, you should be paying enough attention.
And I admit working in the mining industry for the past 11 years has coloured my language somewhat. I try to curb my language in everyday conversation, but I can hold my own in a room full of bikers if you know what I mean.
But come on - if someone Draw 2's ya, than Skips ya, and then Draw 4's ya bang!bang!bang! like that, don't they deserve to be called a (I'm going to use words that rhyme with what I 'allegedly' said.) "trucking runt of a sore!"?
Are you sure?
'Cause seriously, C so did deserve it. C'mon! If ya gonna Draw 2-Skip-Draw 4 someone you'd had best be meaning it. That's all I'm saying. And when she put down that frickin' Draw four card she looked at me, and apologuised so nicely that I knew she didn't mean it! She had it in for me from the get go!
I should probably point out the whole Draw-2... saga happened over 9 months ago. I know I should learn to let it go, but it's hard. It's so hard. Firstly, she deserved it, being all nice about it like that. Secondly, I still do not believe I called her a :ahem:runt. I admit to the 'trucking' and the 'sore', but 'runt' does seem harsh. The other two people playing say I did, but I don't believe them.
So, yeah. I have been given a life-time ban from playing Uno with my friends. I have been given a life-time ban on even being in the same room as them when they are playing, since we tried that, and even then I couldn't control myself. I may have (I admit nothing!) told them to get their acts together, and play it properly.
We have reached a compromise though. I found a computerised version of the game, and they let me play that. I think they like to watch me play it, and talk trash to the hand-held game. I swear though, player two is E-vol. Player two, is going down.