WearyNumber two. You've started to do "The Grandpa Groan" when you bend down and when you get back up again.
Number three. You're shocked by the racy nature of the television show "The Bill".
"The Bill" ferchrissakes. When that starts getting racy you know you're only only 3 semi-permenents away from getting a blue rinse. Last week they had a Lesbian kiss on the show. And I gaped and gasped like a crocheting-7-cat-owning-Maiden-Aunt. I remember the days (That's number four! Using the phrase 'I remember the days in everyday conversation!!') when I The Bill was all about catching crims, and helping hookers with hearts of gold and saying "You're nicked" a lot. Now everyone is bonking everyone else, and there's barely an arrest. Other than arresting fellow police officers for murder and assault.
Although I like to believe that the reason I gasped and gaped wasn't becuase of the kiss, but because of the cliche. The blonde lady has a child. The other lady is a long red-haired biker chick. I thought the writers of the show were better than that. Going for such an overused cliche like that. Tut tut BBC, tut tut.
I'm also worried that the show has started using ex-soap stars from Australia. The day Toadie turns up in Sun Hill I shall very much be on the look out for at least two of the Four Horse-Men of the Apocalyspe.
