Jimbo at work asked me what I got for Valentines Day. Actually, he was showing a guy around the lab who may or may not be accepting a job in the lab, and I think he was trying to seem like he (Jimbo) is a great guy who gets along with everyone in the lab (Instead of wht he really is - a big tosser).
So I turned to the new guy, and said "I have a really good reply to that, so would you mind covering your ears while I answer. Now! Ask me again!"
And Jimbo, the silly silly man, asked me again. "So what did you get for Valentines Day??"
To which I replied: "Syphilis."
The look of horror on his face was totally worth it.
(And for the record, I do not have said disease.)
After I said it, it went around the lab like a bush-fire. People were in hysterics, and most wished that they had thought of saying it themselves.
I was hoping someone else would ask me, as my next reply was going to be "Morning sickness."